This is it, i went and made my life more complicated than it already was by adding a new factor, a child, to the equation. Find advice, support and good company (and some stuff just for fun). Find advice, support and good company (and some stuff just for fun). Subscribe to Medium for only $5/month & read ALL my sizzling hot stories! The baby grew in her, she birthed it, she fed it, and she nurtured it every step of the way. Every toddler boy I've ever met has a destructive streak I am just not into. What issues have you two had? It would feel odd. Sooner or later it'll be over. The educational health content on What To Expect is reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts to be up-to-date and in line with the latest evidence-based medical information and accepted health guidelines, including the medically reviewed What to Expect books by Heidi Murkoff. AND NO ONE IN THIS SITUATION WILL BE HAPPY IF IT IS. Don't feel guilty if you're not in a constant state of love and bliss when you have a new baby. I know this is not the time to criticise as the harm has already been caused, but i will still ask: If you claim you dnt love someone, how on earth did u get involved with her, let alone put her in the family way? We had two kidsnice little family unit. start communicatin with her without quarrellin give her a try n am sure things gonna work out Or r u afraid u wont be able to sleep around or play ur games wen she step into urlife dear dwag such life n face reality. Obviously she is going to get custody if we split up. I honestly could not ever think of missing out on this child's growing up, especially the early stages. We found out. Okay so long story very short my ex gi Long story short, My current girlfriend keeps in contact wit Long story short. My only advice is to make sure you don't make your or your wife or your baby's life miserable. It was ok if we didn't want to be together. She has done nothing wrong and I feel I am just going to destroy her life! Also, you must then decide if you want to be in the child's life, how you will coordinate co-parenting a kid when you're not in a relationship, etc. Be confident. I got pregnant in September of 2011. SHE WILL ALSO HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO THINK ABOUT WHAT'S BEST FOR HER CHILD. Maybe he doesn't like being used. Lovers have a fun in comfortable room. WTF re u saying tat u will nt marry her if I was tat gal u will marry by force so tat when u die n return u will fu*k people that u love total rubbish.Now u want freedom my ass u wont get so whos gonna to marry ur baby mommy?? They didn't want to break up the family. When I had my first baby as a young single mom, I didn't have a car and I figured it out with the help of my family. Glancing over my shoulder in a coffee shop, I saw a couple of women, both bouncing perfectly content babies on their laps. but she didn't have her baby . Sometimes their families even paid a dowry to the groom . No love. As I read the last couple lines I typed, I sound so selfish. She actually is (5 months now), but I took all the words back (the reasons why I didn't want to be with her). My ex won't come back to me after I hurt h Ex girlfriend is pregnant with her new boyfriend months after breaking up with me. My partner works alot which I think is the cause of us not having any connection? Ease into the conversation. seriously.. i find it hard to understand SOME MEN. JP friend, thanks for taking the time to read my post and offer your advise. Man and woman making love in bed. In the end its all about the kids. Postpartum Depression and Anxiety: An Open Letter to the Partners Back then I loved her and I felt sorry for her because she took the decision of getting marry to me even though she didn't love me. Either way, I was ready to "play house". We won't agree with you, if we think you are not right, sorry, girl! My Husband Doesn't Want Another Kid, so I'm - The Atlantic I have many regrets from the past and can't bear to add another one to the long list. Then suddenly she is all happy, and loved up which I find really hard to believe. Having A Baby With Someone You Don't Want To Be With, How To Deal With It? He's controlling you since you are 100% dependent on him. It will not update but downgrade yourself. He pays for the stuff bc he can afford too and didn't want me working while pregnant which was fine when everything was good. I was literally about to break up with her (we were in the process of breaking up), when she announced she was pregnant. I was By entering this site you declare To start? She bullied me into a wedding & now I am miserable. If you have the "baby blues" you might not notice the sadness or moodiness right away. My girlfriend is pregnant and suddenly i realize that she may not be all i ever wanted. BE A MANam done. If you feel a message or content violates these standards and would like to request its removal please submit the following information and our moderating team will respond shortly. That is exactly how I feel about my life over the past 8 years - it feels like I have been sleepwalking. So, maybe try to establish a relationship with your baby now, stick it out for a year or so (w/o getting married), then once you've bonded w/the kid and proven you are a devoted dad, split up w/GF and file for custody. I was not in love with the guy I got pregnant by. The guy I was seeing was fun to party with but I didn't love him. And in some cases, she may want to keep the baby, but you don't. But what do you do in this situation? Don't marry someone you don't love. I don't know if that's just hormones talking or what! BE RESPOSIBLE MAKE SURE TO BE THERE FOR THE CHILD. In order to fully understand why I've come to this conclusion on why men stop wanting sex with women they're in a relationship with, it's important to understand every part of the reality dose . 8 Facts About Having a Baby With a Surrogate - Health There are more than likely services in your area to help you get on your feet (welfare,food stamps,shelter). I make significantly more income then her, so I know she will need the child support, which will at least allow me to be in my child's life, but I don't want my child to be exposed to an unhappy marriage. Lastly, keeping a child she wanted to abort could cause her to hate the child, it's not guaranteed she would love the child when it was born. I hope everything works out for you. Aim to have a better and best partner that you can have. The way you wrote that sounds like you think what a man wants is not as important as what a woman wants. It tears me apart. Do not be with someone you don't want to be with. Being pregnant isn't an excuse to work not work, I worked up until I was 38 weeks along by choice. Long story short my ex dumped me. They had to do it because the marriage was arranged or demanded, as their families saw them as a burden and financial responsibility to be passed on to a man who was willing to take her off their hands. Twins & Multiples: Your Tentative Time Table, Planned c section too presumptuous??? The 10 Best OnlyFans Porn and OnlyFans XXX Creators of 2023 YOU GOT THIS! And the same with me. Just not with her. It was required that women felt their decreased desire was significantly lower than that of their partner's. The authors interviewed 15 women between the ages of 25 and 59. Would I do it again? The guy obviously does not love the girl in question yet went ahead and had a baby with her out of wedlock. 1) If you seriously just want the child, but not the mother, you know this can never happen unless you have an agreement with your girlfriend. She was expressing her feelings and thoughts about feeling like she won't love her child which she should probably talk to her doctor or a therapist about since I'm pretty sure there is a form of depression you can have before having the child but can't think of the name of it off the top of my head. She is 6 months pregnant now. 4. I know things would be going so much smoother in my life if I wasn't preggo but there hasn't been a day I questioned my love for this baby. What now? And remember, folks who don't want kids don't want kids. Second thing that you can do after having a baby with someone you don't want to be with, how to deal with it is to be responsible. He's controlling. Take public transportation until you can get your own car and focus on your baby. Why Do Women Marry Men They Don't Love? - Medium 'I regret having children' In pushing the boundaries of accepted maternal response, women are challenging an explosive tabooand reframing motherhood in the process By Anne Kingston At first. Damaged. I know some people may be asking why having sex with someone you dont love. SCENARIO 3: FORGET ABOUT THE WOMAN YOU LOVE. Long story short, I don't love my pregnant girlfriend. I hated the way I felt with him. . YOU CANNOT PROVIDE HAPPINESS WHEN YOU ARE NOT HAPPY. We respect everyones right to express their thoughts and opinions as long as they remain respectful of other community members, and meet What to Expects Terms of Use. And a bit frightening. I have read many times that people say don't make any major changes in the baby's first year of life. If she says she doesn't want the relationship then that's fine but if a man says he doesn't then that's selfish. That's what we tackle in today's blog. Chandra is a mom of three boys (8, 4, and 3) and the founder of Oh Lovely Day, a lifestyle blog with a honest look at motherhood.She is trying to create more of an open dialogue with a no . She got pregnant 3 months after meeting him. Eight women in their 20s, 30s, and 40s spoke to Insider about their decision to be child-free. No one can tell you what to do, we all have different stories. Don't assume the baby will be just like his daddy, your baby may have a few similarities to him cause he's his child but your baby will be one of a kind in your eyes. I know quite a few mothers who weren't ready (not that anyone ever is) to have a baby when they did and just grew to resent their child. the repercussions and consequences of such an act always plays out. I Have A Baby With A Girl I Don't Love - GhanaCelebrities.Com Though it didn't work out, I never regretted it. Pros And Cons Of Being A "Baby Face" Woman | Regain Take this advice as if your life depends on it. Moreland told me, "Some moms have that immediate, overwhelming, love-at-first-sight feeling with their newborns; others don't. And that's okay. You could have the best partner and tons of family support. The #1 app for tracking pregnancy and baby growth. 'Don't expect rewards in love': woman, 32, who desperately wants a baby To begin, the average cost of vaginal delivery in the US, with health insurance, is $4,300. no wonder we have the type of problems we have in our communitieswe are always reacting instead of thinking.. you cant correct a mistake or problem with another people.. I am a single mom and have been for a few years- however, my first child was planned with my fiance' and we were madly in love and it was the greatest, happiest time of my life. Good luck. First step: Don't rush things. I am trying REALLY hard to find some common ground with him, to love him, or even like him but the more time goes on the more miserable I am. I mean really a woman gets pregnant with your child and there are no options but to marry her? Just that simple. A cesarean birth, which accounts for 21% of births today, costs around. We keep them up because there are a ton of great conversations here and we believe you deserve to see them all. When we found out this baby is a boy, the feeling of disconnection multiplied; I know this baby is going to be like his daddy. I'm in love with a married man And his wife is pregnant. You will love that baby no matter what when it gets here! This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply. @jessi, how come i never get to meet these kind of guys,i swear i would have cut off your stupid sausage,put in the toilet and flush it off nonsence, @jessi, maame plz its rude to cut sumones sausage.sincerely the fault might come from the gal,maybe she did self arrangement ahohyehy3.and resulted in the pregnancy. Idnt also think the said mother would marry someone who wouldnt make her happy. So they say don't break up, move, change careers, etc in the first year. Signs That Your Boyfriend Is Not Over His Baby Mama (21 Sure Signs to Add to Collection. Keep reading for our tips and advice, and then give Pregnancy & Fatherhood Solutions a call today at (915) 249-1344 or visit us online to . I wasn't happy. It was enough for me to be content, while I gave the kids a life that I never had. I My ex-girlfriend is pregnant. It just reads so snobby and lazy. I can't bear the thought of breaking up and not being a part to this child's upbringing. You should do what will make you happy. Your post will be hidden and deleted by moderators. Personally I think if you both have similar life views (finances, rearing children, religion) then I think you could make this a long lasting beautiful relationship and your child can grow up in a loving home with mom and dad. I couldn't be myself with him. You are in control of your life. This is the most stupid guy I have seen in my life twety something years of existance. We are deciding if we should divorce now or later when she is bigger. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Gabrielle Union and Dwyane Wade have welcomed their first baby to their family. The thought of her raising my kid with another man makes me feel sick, I hate this. It's that type of kindness you feel toward someone who's very close to your heart. A Group Leader is a What to Expect community member who has been selected by our staff to help maintain a positive, supportive tone within a group. hmmmm my advise to u is to pray to God n ask for forgiveness, i wonder the big talk u used on this gal b4 u got her on bed and now ur running frm ur responsibility. We didn't have to be. We tried to make it work. 'Don't expect rewards in love': woman, 32, who desperately wants a baby says she dated 100 men in a year, renewing marriage pressure debate in China A woman went on more than 100 dates. Ex GIrlfriend blocked me out of the blue! I've made my OWN money since I was 15 years old and before I quit my job to MOVE Paid for all my own stuff and bills WITHOUT his help. 10 Behaviors Women Show When They're With Their True Love and our His baby mama got engaged to some dude while pregnant calls her fiance the kid's 'daddy', despite my friend wanting to be a father to his child. It depends on the person. If you don't love her then don't be with her. AND THE END OF THE DAY IS ALSO HERS. I have heard that arranged marriages actually have a better long term outcome because of this. My two oldest remember some fighting and the divorce. I am wondering if i can and how i can win my ex back. @jessi, LMFAOI like ur commentVery BLUNT and to the POINT. You're sort of talking like you want a sugar daddy. He's not all bad. IF YOU BOTH DECIDED TO STAY IN A LOVELESS RELATIONSHIP. Once the humiliation of being in a loveless marriage is confronted, it can be accepted and even result in a long-term relationship. I don't have any memories of them not fighting. A Group Owner is a member that has initiated the creation of a group to connect with other members to share their journey through the same pregnancy & baby stages. Firstly, I am sending my regards to you all. "Once you cross that line, look for life to get easier in every way. Hey I know exactly how you feel. I know that my kids love us both. My greatest concern is the child. I was literally about to break up with her (we were in the process of breaking up), when she announced she was pregnant. You could have an easy pregnancy, a quick easy delivery and a healthy happy baby. Ex My moving on process. Grown apart and have no interest in each others lives! bumboclaath mi nuh hv any advice fi u.battybwoy! Your bodies will fit together perfectly. I do feel sorry for you and the situation you are in. I just don't think it's right to bring a child into the world when you can see the end of the relationship. Thank you for purchase! It's why your lady friend just said those two possibly thrilling, possibly terrifying words: "I'm pregnant." So what do you say when the woman you. What Happens If You Don't Have Sex For A Long Time Or Ever? In fact, before we found out I was pregnant (which was completely unplanned) I was thinking of breaking up with him. 2005-2023Everyday Health, Inc., a Ziff Davis company. Rejecting your man's baby mama is almost the same as rejecting your boyfriend's child and you don't want to do that. CLARITY friend you do make a lot of sense. That showed up as a third factor." There I said it: I don't want a baby boy - Pregnancy Magazine Being in a loveless relationship is not a good example for the LO you already have and the one on the way. Have you told him you're pregnant yet? Trust me dude, do whatever you have to to end this A.S.A.P. Made a mistake without any intention to make it surely will freak someone out. THIS IS THE ENVIROMENT IN THIS SITUATION.